Procrastination. Procrastina-a-tion is making me wait….

I know, I know, those aren’t the words, but they sure are the problem. I’ve been scarce on my blog lately with good reason. I’m back in school!! I’m determined to finally complete that undergrad degree that has eluded me for so long. When it's all said and done I will be holding my bachelor’s in English in my hot little hand in May of 2011!!! I’m enjoying being back in school, but I have to admit that I was not prepared for the workload! I’m trying to get my rhythm going and I fear that by the time I get it, the summer semester will be over! It goes without saying that I haven’t figured out how to work blogging into my “schedule” just yet either, I’m working on it though!

So as I work my way through my first three classes (the only semester I’ll need to take three classes thank God!), I’m rediscovering some things about myself - namely my tendency to procrastinate! Perfect example, I have a 4 page paper due TODAY that I’ve only just started. The idea had been rolling around in my head for a few days, but I didn’t take the time to sit and write it all down before now. (Then of course there is this break right here to write a blog post because all my adoring “fan” needs to hear from me right now! Thanks Mom!) I’m not so much worried that I won’t get it done, I always do. It’s just the cycle that this behavior always takes me through. For me, it’s a vicious cycle: I have a task, I make a plan to accomplish it and then I find a billion other things to do up until the last minute where I am scrambling to beat the clock, stressing over it, and beating myself up for waiting so long AGAIN! It is an exercise in frustration to say the least. And each time I vow - “Never again!!” Yeah right!

It reminds me of the merry-go-rounds on the playground. Remember them? As a kid I used to love that ride, but I was never good at getting off when I’d had enough. The few times I tried to jump off I ended up scraped and scratched, so eventually I would just ride it out until it slowed down enough for me to stop it with my foot, then I’d get off and go join everyone else for the next game which was usually already in progress!

Not only do I see this cycle manifesting in my academic life, but it spills over into my spiritual life as well. First I don’t read or pray or whatever one day, then it becomes 3 days, then a week… The cares and the distractions of life come in and eat up all my time and before I know it I’m 7 years old again, stuck on the merry-go-round, trying to find the right time to jump off. Unlike the merry-go-round, I’m learning to jump of this cycle as soon as I recognize there is a problem so I go around less and less.
Ok, well, duty calls so I am going to jump off right here and make the most of the 12 hours I have left! YIKES! Have a Magnificent Monday!