15 Minutes (aka I'm Thirsty)
Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness, For they shall be filled. (Matt 5:6 NKJV)
"My soul is thirsty, my soul is thirsty for You - as the deer is thirsty for the water so does my soul long for Thee, my spirit needs refreshing, Father, I'm thirsty, thirsty for You...I'm thirsty!" (Pastor Marvin Sapp - Thirsty CD)
thirst: a sensation of dryness in the mouth and throat associated with a desire for liquids; also : the bodily condition (as of dehydration) that induces this sensation b: a desire or need to drink 2: an ardent desire (Merriam Webster's dictionary)
I couldn't quite put my finger on what had been going on with me lately. Was it restlessness? Not exactly... Frustration? Not really... Dissatisfaction maybe? Not quite... What was the deal? What was it that I was longing for to the point of distraction? My soul was crying out for something - big time - but what?
Then a couple days ago I was listening to the song, Thirsty, and it hit me like a freight train - I'm thirsty! You know that thirst you get where your throat feels like cracked earth that hasn't been rained on in too long and the only thing that will truly satisfy it is water? That's what I felt like in my soul. I remember times when I tried to quench my physical thirst with other things - soda, juice, a sports drink all to no avail. Those other liquids didn't give me what I needed.
So spiritually I was feeling that dryness that comes from not having been rained on by God's presence in too long. I tried to quench the thirst with other things - maybe if I listened to enough sermons or Christian music, talked to enough people "about" God, thought about Him hard enough, but none of those things gave me what I needed. The only thing that would satisfy my soul's thirst was time alone with my Father.
I hadn't realized how long it had been. So busy was I running around putting out brush fires and dealing with the issues of life that I didn't have time to really spend with God and I hadn't realized it - until I began to thirst for His presence. My thirst was so strong it wasn't a question of whether or not I would take care of it, but of when. I mean there are only so many hours in the day to do everything that needs to be done - how was I going to find the time to satisfy my thirst?
That's when I understood God to say that if I promised to get up 15 minutes earlier each morning and give that time to Him, He would satisfy my thirst. I shook myself - that had to be a mistake... 15 minutes?! What could 15 minutes do? It seemed like such a miniscule amount of time to offer God... And then there was the whole issue about losing 15 minutes of sleep from a day that already starts way too early - too early for me anyway... but thats for another blog! Bottom line is - if this is what God wanted then I would do it because I was willing to do whatever it took to quench my thirst.
This morning was my first day and I wish I had words to adequately describe what God did in 15 minutes! Not only did He meet me there, but He rained on my dry places and I could feel the things in me that had withered and dried up in the drought coming back to glorious life. In 15 minutes! Who would have thought 15 minutes could make such a difference? Certainly not me. I didn't "do" a whole lot either... I basically sat in God's presence. Honestly, it felt like I was sitting in my Father's lap just listening to His breathing and His hearbeat and it did wonders for my thirsty soul. Can't wait till tomorrow!! :o)